Real Marriages: Ricky and Jo
Date of wedding: 2 September 1995
We were best friends for a few years. I was a School Nurse, Ricky used to help out with Boys Hockey practice from time to time on campus. Now, Ricky was very clever… I had been engaged before, & was not looking for another relationship… ever! So he very patiently befriended me & tenderly won my heart over the next couple of years! Well this tactic has borne great fruit in our marriage. Being Best Friends is something that endures all storms, like an anchor. I am so grateful to Ricks for this wisdom.
Picnic-Pilgrimage Wedding of about 70 close friends & family, we dragged them off for a weekend into a remote spot in the bush. Most of the party stayed at a monastery Guest House, before the Wedding Every one got involved doing flowers, or catering etc & then we ventured to a distant Chapel in a divine spot, in the middle of no where for the Wedding & picnic. Had a lovely day, went off on Honeymoon & our guests returned to enjoy Gregorian Chart, Church Bells & the Monks fresh bread, back at Inkomana Abbey, before they all journeyed home the following day!
Life is here to test our Character, & Weddings certainly do! I was more stressed about what I was about to Promise, realizing that vows are no joke, & THIS vow had life long consequences, I mean, come hell or high water, this was 4eva! I hadn’t realized just how much Grace God gives, when I bank on His Strength & not my own! That everything works out for the best, not to see apparent disaster, without realizing there is a hidden blessing, take a deep breath, tighten your seat-beat, life is about to take off … in a good way!
We all just had such fun! It was carefree & lovely. There were rural children who joined in & a few cows grazing near-by. It was a glorious day, beautiful mountains & springs, forests & open fields just refreshing & perfect for a picnic!
We got lost driving around trying to find the friends who’d charge of my Wedding Dress, we got the wrong place & barged in on some poor unsuspecting people enjoying a holiday in the area! … & it took us longer to find our friends, change & then get to the Wedding! But at the same time we took it in our stride & all was well. I would have included my family more in the service, checked directions, found time to play with my little Bridesmaid… & had longer dancing with my Beloved!
My husband & I have a wonderful relationship, with God at the center: we are one in faith, one in spirit, one in mind & one in body. However, we’re both strong willed so it’s been an adventure none the less! Then when we knock heads we refocus & remember: we’re on the SAME SIDE, we’re in this TOGETHER, lighten up a bit & learn to Love. Highlights include everyday life together, living the moment. Our trips to Croatia & Rome … we went on midnight hikes & had wonderful memories packed tight. How do I admit, that every moment in his arms = a Highlight? When he looks at me, or calls during the day, that I feel wooed all over again, at a deeper level. How long have we been married, do you ask? … ( *wink* )
After God, nothing is more important than your relationship with your beloved! Keep things real, keep things fun! Focus on what really counts & life won’t overwhelm you. Continually go on Marriage enrichment courses / retreats, be around people who honor marriage, find Marriage Mentors you admire & LEARN to Love. Our world has forgotten, so make it priority. Love rules, never forget.
We treasure our couple time, pray together, play together & work on our relationship, deciding to LIVE each day to the full, delighting in each other. Our Happiness is not determined by what’s happening. An attitude of gratitude determines our altitude! Be a high flying Lover.
First: know what Marriage is… what you are promising, so that you truly make a Gift of yourself, completely. Be sure you have chosen well. That it’s Wonderful! BE NOT AFRAID!